Santa Singh and his Wish

Santa Singh and his wife had been married for 40 years and also celebrated their 60th birthdays.

During the celebration, a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple all these years, she would give them one wish each.

Being the faithful, loving spouse for all these years, naturally Santa's wife wanted for herself and her husband to have a romantic vacation together, so she wished for them to travel around the world.

The fairy waved her wand and boom! … The wife had the tickets in her hand.

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Desi Style of Biking

This happens as the unavailability of fine roads increases in India..

Pagal Bhai MBA

Ek aadmi roz subah ped ki dal pe chadh ke baith jata tha.

pucho kyun ??

?
?

MBA karke pagla gaya tha.

Apne aap ko Branch Manager samjhta tha.

Why is Lincon Unhappy?

Why GANDHi Ji Smiles on every rupees & ABRAHM L!NC0N didn't smile in dollar ?

bcoz...

American women dont keep d money inside their

"B.L.O.U.S.E.!!"

Sardar's Advise for Rainy Season

Some Modern Desi Definitions

Dimag: Vicharo ki factory.

School: 5 hrs ki jail

College: Yuvao ka bagicha

Professor: 1 hour ka radio

Lawyer: Paaglo ka anubhavi

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Love Letter of a Biscuit

Dear MARIE!

Today is a GOODDAY.

U have Krack'jacked my litle heart.

Now I am in 50-50 position.

Plz don't play Hide N Seek.

Yours Tiger

Desi Body Builder

This desi guy tried to build his body using photographic tricks but failed in various parts.

Indecent Exposure

Santa Singh's wife is walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out. A policeman approaches her and says, "Madam, you may be on jail for indecent exposure?"

She says, "Why, officer?"

"Because your breast is hanging out."

She looks down and says, "OH MY GOODNESS! I left the baby on the bus again!"

Desire to have a White child...

Ek Madrassi Ki Nayi Nayi Shadi Hui, Aur Vo Biwi Ko Leke Honeymoon Manane Train Mein Ja Raha Thha.

Train Mein Sath Wali Seat Par Ek Angrej Bhi Betha Thha.

Madrasi Ke Dimag Mein Aya Ki Agar Main Apni Biwi Ka Sex Is Se Karwa Lu To Bachha Gora Paida Hoga

Madrassi Ne Angrej Se Puchha: “Kya Tum Meri Biwi Ke Sath Sex Karoge?”

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Mobile Theater in India

Indian people love to watch cinema. But hundreds of thousand people living in remote villages do not have easy access to cinema hall. This is why some business men operates their mobile theater. Here are some scenes of this kind of theater:




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Elephant and a Cat

Cat: How old are you?

Elephant: 5 years.

Cat: You look big.

Elephant: I am a COMPLAN BOY... and how old are you?

Cat: I am 20 years.

Elephant: But you look very small.

Cat: PONDS AGE MIRACLE !!

Where am I ?

A tourist to india desides to use hot air baloon. He enjoys a lot but a sudden hurricane makes him lost. He is out of contact and very frightened. Finally he arrives over Bihar. He looks down and sees a farmer in the fields. He opens his hindi translation book and shouts to him 'Main kaha hun?'

The Bihari farmer looks back up and shouts back, 'Chal hat burbak! Hamko buddhu samajhte ho ka? Tum ohi udan chhatrai par ho.'

Google Translation of Bollywood Dialogues

Laloo lost Election..

A major traffic jam was preventing people from moving forward.

A motorist shouted out wanting to know what was happening.

A guy from the front replied, "Well at the traffic crossing Laloo Yadav is sprawled across the road.

He is refusing to move from there!"

"But why?"

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Aishwarya gone Pregnant

सबसे बेहतरीन चीज़...

कई सालों की रिसर्च के बाद,

तमाम दुनिया के डॉक्टर,

इस नतीजे पर पहुंचे हैं कि

जुकाम के लिए सबसे बेहतरीन चीज़ -

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Why lots of Students Fail the Exam?

It’s not the fault of a student if he/she fails his exam, let's see what are the reasons..

Typical academic year for a student. 365 Days

1. Sundays-52, Sundays are for rest.

Days left 313.

2. Summer holidays-50 where weather is very hot and difficult to study.

Days left 263.

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Vegetable Market

Indian vegetable markets are fun to watch. (Photo manipulation)

सरदार जी का गणित

संता सेना में भर्ती होने के लिए परीक्षा देने गया.

परीक्षक – ३ + ५ कितने होते हैं ?

संता – ८.

परीक्षक – ७ + ३ ?

संता – १०.

परीक्षक – ८ + ८ ?

संता – पता नहीं सर.

परीक्षक – क्यों ?

संता – क्योंकि मेरे पास सिर्फ १० ही उँगलियाँ हैं !!!

Interesting Facts about Indian Cities

India is one of the largest countries in the world and consists of varieties of customs and cultures. You can find some totally different human behaviors in each cities of this country. Suppose you are in an Indian city but don't know which city is it. In that situation, the following tips can help you in identifying the name of the town:

Scenario 1

Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along, then a fourth and they start arguing about who's right. You are in Kolkata

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The Cute Desi Red Panda

Red Panda is an animal found in the eastern Himalayas specially in China and Sikkim and Assam of  India. Someone has dressed this cute animal with Indian saree and blouse. How much beautiful, you believe, she is?

Findings of Desi Scientists

After digging to a depth of 100 meters last year, Russian scientists found traces of copper wire dating back 1000 years, and came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network one thousand years ago.

So, not to be outdone, in the weeks that followed, American scientists dug 200 metres and headlines in the US papers read: "US scientists have found traces of 2000 year old optical fibres, and have concluded that their ancestors already had advanced high-tech digital telephone 1000 years earlier than the Russians."

One week later, the Indian newspapers reported the following: "After digging as deep as 500 metres, Indian scientists have found absolutely nothing. They have concluded that 5000 years ago, their ancestors  were already using wireless technology."

Dahej Me Dokha

Someone got this motorcycle in dahej..

Planting the Onions

A man in Tihad jail receives a letter from his wife:

"Dear Husband, I have decided to plant some onion in the back garden. When is the best time to plant them?"

The prisoner, knowing that the prison guards read all mail, replied in a letter:

"Dear Wife, whatever you do, do not touch the back garden. That is where I hid all the money."

A week or so later, he received another letter from his wife:

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Dating in Desi Style

This is how people date in our country.

Convention on Sardars Are Not Stupid

80,000 sardars meet in a stadium, for a " Sardars Are Not stupid " Convention.

The leader says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that Sardars are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer ? "

A sardar gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. The leader asks him, "What is 15 plus 15 ? "

After 15 or 20 seconds he says, " Eighteen ! "

Obviously everyone is a little disappointed.

Then 80,000 sardars start cheering, "Give him another chance! Give him another chance ! "

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How to make people happy?

The popular desi leaders Laloo, Jayalalitha, and Karunanidhi are on a long flight in an Air Force plane. Laloo pulls out a 100 Rupee note and says, "I'm going to throw this Rs. 100 note out and make someone down below happy."

Jayalalitha not wanting to be outdone says, "If that was my 100 Rupee note, I would split it into two Rs. 50 notes throw them down and make two people down below happy."

Of course karunanidhi doesn't want these two candidates to out do him so he pipes in, " I would instead take one hundred Rs. 1 notes and throw them out to make 100 people just a little happier."

At this point the pilot who has overheard all this bragging and can't stand it anymore comes out and says, "If I throw all three of you out of this plane and I'll make 100 crore people happy!"

37 Reasons Why Motorcycles Are Better Than Women

One of our clever sardar's argument on why motorcycles are better than a woman:

1. Motorcycles only need their fluids changed every 2,000 miles.

2. Motorcycles' curves never sag.

3. Motorcycles last longer.

4. Motorcycles don't get pregnant.

5. You can ride a Motorcycle any time of the month.

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All things are allowed here

May be the authority asking- Whose Kartoot is this??

Sardar the Husband

A Sardar gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom.

He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.

”What’’s up?” he says.

”I’m having a heart attack,” cries the woman.

He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he’s dialling. his five-year-old son comes up and says, “Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Surender is hiding in your wardrobe and he’s got no clothes on!”

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Desi Goats

Goats have special capacity to climb a tree.

The Elephant and the Bananas

An elephant has 5 bananas and it is hungry, but yet it does not eat the bananas. Why?

Because the bananas are made of plastic.

Next…Q
The 5 bananas are real , but yet the elephant does not eat it. Why?

Because the elephant is made of plastic.
Hahhaa…never give up…one more..

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Desi Pickle

The best place to get this Desi Indian Pickle may be the Parliament House!!

100 Dollars for the Story

An Indian tourist walks into a curio shop in San Francisco. Looking around at the exotica, he notices a very life-like, Life-sized bronze statue of a rat. It has no price tag, but is so striking he decides he must have it.

He takes it to the owner: "How much for the bronze rat?"

"Twelve dollars for the rat, one hundred dollars for the Story," says the owner.

The tourist gives the man twelve dollars. "I'll just take the rat, you can keep the story."

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English Speaking Class

Hahaha!! This should not be Disha Institute, the perfect name would be "Deshi Institute". Yeh Institute join karo aur jor jor se ईङ्गलिस स्पीको...

Desi style of English Alphabets

A for apple
B for bada apple
C for chhota apple
D for dusra apple
E for ek aur apple
F for fokat ka apple
G for gol apple
H for hazar apple
I for itney saarey apple?

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Yoga is Popular Everywhere

Yoga is popular everywhere. You watched grandma and even dogs doing yoga in our previous posts. Here are some more pictures from Russia as a proof of the popularity of this desi art of living:

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Brain Teasers

Here are some funny brain teasers. Try to your best.

1. What is the easiest way to throw a ball, have it stop, and completely reverse direction after traveling a short distance?
2. What is at the beginning of eternity, the end of time, the beginning of every end, and the end of every place? When things go wrong, what can you always count on?
3. What is always behind you but you can never touch it?
4. I am never the first to speak but I am always the last to be heard. Who am I?
5. We were born of the same mother, on the same day, at the same hour and in the same year. Yet we are not twins. How do you explain this?
6. Two fathers and two sons were seated round a table. There were four apples on the table. Each of them took one apple and ate it entirely yet there was still one apple left on the table. How was this possible?
7. Before Mount Everest was discovered which was the highest mountain in the world?
8. Here everything is not always in order. For example, Friday comes before Thursday, the cart comes before the horse, the driver comes before the employer. Where are we?
9. When I am alive I stay put where I am. It is only when I am dead that I move about here and there. Who am I?
10. How can you be behind a person when that person is also behind you?

Answers below:

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10 Kanjoos Jokes

Kanjoos: Yeh kela (banana) kaisay diya?
Shopkeeper: 1Rs.
Kanjoos: 60 Paisa ka deta hai?
S.K: 60 paise mein to sirf chilka milega.
Kanjoos: Ley 40 paisay, chilka rakh aur kela day de.
-----------------------------------
A Kanjoos on his death time.
My wife, where r u ?
Wife:Yes, Im here
My sons & daughters ru all here?
Yes, Papa
Kanjoos:To phir baju wale kamre
ka pankha Q khula hay
-----------------------------------

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Desi Networking

India is very rich in telecommunication and electrification network.

Busy Sardar

Santa joined new job...

1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.

Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.

Santa: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.

Arabian News Reader

Burkewali News Reader!!

Sardar's Eye Problem

Banta Singh goes to the eye doctor. The receptionist asks him why he is there.

Banta complains, "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes."

The receptionist asks, "Have you ever seen a doctor?"

Banta replies, "No, just spots."

Gandhi in Smoke

Hats off to the graphic designer who created this. Image of Mahatma Gandhi in incense smoke is amazing.

Sardar Jee at Exam

A Sardar reported for his university final examination that consisted of yes/no type questions.

He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes and then, in a fit of inspiration, checks his pocket, takes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking the answer sheet: Yes for Heads, and No for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done, whereas the rest of the class is still sweating it out.

During the last few minutes he is seen desperately throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on."I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm rechecking my answers."

Sardar Jokes in Pictures

There are thousands of Sardar (Blonde version of India) Jokes in the net. o4o presents some of these jokes in pictorial format. View them and have fun:

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Sardar Jee to a Dentist

Santa Singh was having tooth problem and got an appointment with a top dentist.

Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, but don’t worry it will take just five minutes.

Santa: And how much will it cost?

Dentist: It’s 2000 Rupees.

Santa: Rs. 2000 for just a few minutes work???

Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.

Desi Man and Gambling

A beggar asks Desi man for a Rupee.

"Do you drink, smoke, or gamble?" asks desi man.

The beggar says, "I don't touch a drop, never smoked and hate gambling."

"Okay," says desi man, "If you will come home with me I will give you a 10 Rupees."

As they enter the house, Desi man's wife takes him aside and hisses, "How dare you bring that terrible looking man into our home!?"

"Darling," says desi man, "I just wanted you to see what a man looks like who doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and doesn't gamble."